The “Strong Black Woman”

“The Prodigal Experience”

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Have you ever experienced a time where you felt lost and confused? I’m sure we have all gone through times of confusion about who we are and what our purpose is. Yesterday I had thought-provoking conversation with a family friend, that inspired me to write this post. Our conversation was about how I chose to come back home with my family, to figure out my life and to feeling like a failure because of that.

See, before moving back home to Dallas, I was in living independently in Houston; I had graduated, and ended up getting a job that I thought was for me, but soon found out that it wasn’t. The company let me go, and I of course wanted to know why because I thought that I was doing my very best…

I was there for exactly a month, and honestly felt like I didn’t belong, I wasn’t sure of my responsibilities at all. I thought that I was just being irrational, so I pushed those thoughts out and tried to keep the best attitude about my new position. The day I got fired was already crap, and I worked a full day *rolls eyes*. I was called into the conference room and let go within 10 minutes. I cried, I mean ugly cried in front of someone who possibly could have cared less about my well-being. I cried because I knew that I couldn’t fight what wasn’t meant for me anymore; it was time for me to go back home and re-access my life.

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My “Prodigal” experience, stems from a biblical story, The Prodigal Son, in which one of the younger sons has to return home after using up all of his inheritance. The father openly embraces and celebrates his son’s return, as he was “lost” and is now “found”. I didn’t have the inheritance to blow, but I did have to return home to get back to my purpose, to get myself together. As I’ve discussed in previous posts, you have to focus on your own path, what’s meant for you, is ONLY FOR YOU.

The conversation that I had with my family friend stuck with me because I knew in my heart of what I was capable of. My friend’s reassuring words, spoke life into me, so much that I am confident in God’s plan for my life. I am not exactly sure of what’s to come, but I am expecting great things. I’ve already been blessed in ways I couldn’t imagine and 2016 isn’t over! Won’t he do it!

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I’m completely open to goodness and the blessings that are prepared for me. I pray that you received something good from this post and that 2017 is good to you.

Thanks for reading loves!

Dating on The Bus: My Experience

 

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It’s 6:33 pm and I’m getting ready for a date…

With some anxiety about writing this post, I’m a little embarrassed to write it but need to. As a 23 year old senior in college  (I graduate in May) I ride the bus for many things; to commute to school, grocery shop, visit my favorite coffee shops etc. And I also use it to date, for the most part.

I’m sure you’re wondering why I’m even writing about this(there’s more important things happening in the world ), but living in Houston, TX you pretty much need a car to go anywhere and if you don’t have one, people tend to change their attitudes towards you. They’ll feel sorry for you, or think you’re not well equipped to living a full life (smdh), which is why dating for me has been a rough patch. I also get those looks like “Oh poor thing she has to ride the bus”. Whenever I get asked out for drinks or something  (yes guys do ask me out surprisingly lol) I have to consider how they will feel about not having a car. I never want a guy to feel as if I’m an obligation to date, that there’s difficulty dating me. I know I might sound like I’m venting my first world problems, but this effects my dating life so I feel the need to address it.

Have you all ever heard or even had conversations about NEVER dating a guy without a car? I sometimes wonder if guys think the same thing, but then it depends on the situation and where you live. I’m sure the folks in New York City don’t really think about this, especially since they can pretty much walk everywhere  (I literally walked the whole time I visited NY). I have this hang up that I should have my whole life together by now which includes having a car, and I don’t. Living in Texas cars represent prestige and wealth, so if you don’t have one, you’re obviously not with the “in-crowd” (totally being sarcastic here).

Yes I know there’s Uber, but I’m on what milienials call “Baller on a Budget” and Houston is too big for me to be riding ubers up and down these streets. I’m OK with riding the bus to go on dates(I don’t want to be a complete hermit). I did once and ended up dating the guy for 6 months, so my dating life isn’t as terrible but I would love for it to pick up a little more, meaning going out more despite my lack of having a car and building connections with the opposite sex.

I remember the first time I went on a date and took the bus, and the guy found out (dun dun dunnnn) he was like “Oh you rode the bus?”

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Seeing his face I froze in fear, I was embarrassed that let myself do this for the sake of enjoying life and companionship. What kind of person am I ?! Well we actually ended up having a conversation about how he used to ride public transportation as well, and our frustrations with it.

The dating life these days is so tricky and makes cringe sometimes, making yourself vulnerable to the chopping block of people’s preconceived thoughts, is scary, it’s overwhelming but it’s something that I can get through if I want to enjoy what life has for me. I will get over how people view me since I ride bus.

Thanks loves for reading my thoughts, tell me about your dating experiences, maybe we can help each other out!