Losing it: Why I want to be a Healthy Fat Woman

Hey yall, yes you read that title right, let’s chat about this idea of body shaming, which is getting on my damn nerves. About two weeks ago I saw Ashley Graham, plus-size super model, get ridiculed for “losing too much weight” on her Instagram, after reading comments of her followers saying that she “wasn’t the plus-size model they once knew” and how she is betraying everyone by being an active healthy woman, this led me to think about my issues with weight. *Cue the dramatic music*, I want to lose weight and I’m actually working towards losing 20-30lbs to get my health on track and to fit back into favorite booty shorts (I can’t zip those damn things up anymore lol).

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But back to Ashley, I’ve observed some of the plus-size community bash these models for losing weight, especially when they become mainstream. I understand both sides of this argument but at the same time I’m irritated that plus-size women are body shaming each other because someone decides to lose weight or get fit and healthy. Fat women are constantly being shamed for their bodies, so what sense does it make to shame another fellow plus ally? Yall, let this lady live her life please!

In regards to my own body, I’ve been wrestling with this idea that if I choose to decide to lose weight and get healthier, I’d lose my following and possibly be shamed for wanting change my body. I’m wanting to change my health, because I want to live as long as I can without health issues interrupting me living my life to the fullest. My family has a long line of health issues in relation to being overweight, but they have all changed their lifestyles and now live fulfilling, healthy lives. Now I’m not saying that you have to be a certain size to enjoy life at all, I’m saying that this is my decision, and plus I can’t part away from my favorite blue jean booty shorts right now. I love my curves and personally believe you can have a healthy body with them, call me crazy but I want to be a healthy fat woman.

Don’t get me wrong, I love my body and all that it can do, I appreciate every roll, my big thighs and not-so-flat tummy. Is it so wrong to want to get back into being more active and healthy? I’d like to walk up and down stairs without getting out of breath and light headed, or get back to doing my favorite soccer drills without feeling like I’m going to pass out within 5 minutes. It’s evident that no matter what anyone does with their body, that everyone won’t be pleased by your decision to change it, but does it matter? No it doesn’t matter to me anymore, because at the end of the day it’s my body and I live in it, your opinion about Ashley Graham doesn’t stop her from living her life and neither will I. Stop body shaming.

I love a cute work out set!

I love a cute work out set!

My hope for this post was to open up the dialogue on how society, including the plus-size community, engages in constant shaming of people’s bodies, there’s already enough crap going on in the world, so lets chill out, ok?

As always, I appreciate you reading, let me know your thoughts on this subject and don’t forget to share, thanks!

-Spookieloo

 

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32 thoughts on “Losing it: Why I want to be a Healthy Fat Woman

  1. Do what makes you happy and people will have to expect it. You have to be happy with you. Don’t stay a certain way because people will shame you. Gosh.. why can’t we all just get along. lol Thanks for sharing this though, I had no clue about that model getting healthier and losing weight that people were shaming her for it.

    http://www.naturallyfarout.com
    -Kierra

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  2. I hate body shaming and it bothers me how some people feel the need to control some one else’s body size like the model she has every right to do what she wants with HER body. I strongly support you in whatever you chose you are strong ❤ Thank you for talking about this topic women need to love and empower one another not body shame ❤

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  3. You should never feel guilty for wanting to live a healthier lifestyle. None of your followers or Ashley’s followers will there for you when you may have health issues in the future etc. I’m all for being proud of the body that you have, but if someone chooses to make a change, they should be able to without being shamed! That’s how I feel, since I’m plus-size. I want to loose weight, and I don’t care who has a problem with it!

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  4. I lost I’ve 50lbs and it took years for me to gain back. When I lost all that weight people had negative things to say about my weight loss and it was frustrating but I just ignored them most the time. Being healthy is the most important thing and loving yourself is important. I think you look amazing and thank you for opening up this conversation because it’s a major problem in our society. We talk about hate but we add to the hate.

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    • You’re right Faith, this among other issues is something that needs to be talked about, I don’t understand how someone can body shame another person for wanting to be healthier and more fit. Thank you for reading!

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  5. This is such an honest and great post. Personally, because I work in medicine, being healthy is top priority in my book. While it can be scary to change because people don’t like change, remember it’s your body. If you want to be healthy, and honestly I don’t see why anyone wouldn’t want to be, then you need to do what it is right for you. I think something positive like trying to get into a healthier place will resonate with your following. You may have a few people who fight it but then they are not following you for the right reasons. Do you girl, do you! Good luck on your journey, I can’t wait to see it unfold!

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    • Elle! Thank you so much for your kind words, living a healthier life is something that’s very important, including mind and body. I’m excited to adopt better behaviors for my life, I want to be able to enjoy it and be healthy.

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  6. I think women with confidence look great no matter how much they weigh! If you feel good you look good! No one should be shamed for their size, no matter how big or small…it doesn’t help!

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  7. There is a lot of subversive talk about body positivity these days, I say eat right and exercise and your body will find a healthy place to settle. That place will look different on every individual and is ideal for your healthy fat woman goal! 🙂

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    • There definitely is a lot of body positive talk going around, which is good but some people are taking it to the extreme and body shaming, I’m just adopting an attitude about not caring about people’s opinions. Thank you for reading!

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  8. This post seriously spoke to me! I lost 30lbs and everyone told me I was getting too skinny – 3 years later ( a move, new job with longer hours etc.) gained it back and I have had people comment about how I gained weight. It’s like we can’t win! But i love this post – I want to be healthy and not worry about anything else!

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    • Hi Lindsey! I’m glad you were able to get something positive out of this post, and yes you’re right I just want to be healthy without worrying about other people’s opinions. Thank you for reading!

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  9. I think people (women in particular) are so tired of seeing magazine and television images of skinny people always being portrayed as happy, popular, sexy and always getting the guy while fat people are always being portrayed as the loud androgynous sidekick who always has to overcompensate for the way they look. Fat people want to have a voice and they want to be represented in a positive light in the media and magazines too. So when someone who happens to be plus sized gets into a position where they are able to represent being plus sized in a positive way to the point where they are even considered sexy and then all of a sudden wants to become one of those skinny people, I think people feel betrayed. They feel that all this “I’m fat and love who I am” was all a lie. They feel that if she’s so proud and happy with who she is, then why is she trying to become what society says she should be – skinny. For any woman who is or has been plus sized, I think secretly, we all have those secret battles going on within ourselves of wanting to love and be proud of our bodies just the way we are, however, there is a part of our subconscious mind that gives in to all those years of programming and tells us that we’d be sexier, happier, feel more free, our clothes would fit better etc. IF ONLY we could lose that ‘extra’ 30 or 40lbs.

    I have have found myself saying “I’m changing my eating habits and exercising for my health”, which absolutely started off being true and the weight loss is just a side effect of the healthier lifestyle. However, the moment I go on vacation and gain 10 lbs from ‘living it up’ , I get all worked up about it and have to get rid of those 10 lbs ASAP. Why should those 10 lbs bother me so much though? If it isn’t about my weight and more about my health, I should be okay with allowing myself to let my hair down once in a while and indulge a bit and simply get back on track without making a big deal just because I can’t fit into those cute skinny jeans I bought. Am I more sexy or happier or a better person if I can fit into those jeans? Is how those jeans fit a measure of my health? Honestly, I think my making a big deal about those 10 lbs is just my subconscious programming playing those commercials and flipping those magazine pages in my head. I think we all wrestle with that. I think if people are honest about their own struggles and can be understanding of the fact that other people are human and have struggles too (even plus sized models), then I don’t think they’d be as quick to indulge in body shaming and finger pointing.

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    • Hey kalliamanika! Thank you so much for your positive vibes, I really appreciate them! I’m actually I’m the works of tracking my progress of weight loss this month. I’ll be checking in periodically with posts on my progression 🙂

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  10. I am the same I want to lose some weight as I want to feel healthy, it’s got nothing to do with the way I look, I am happy but I know it will change as my health is more important. Everyone deserves the right to do what they want to be happy x

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  11. I’m in that process now. So far I’ve lost 20 lbs.; my grandmother asked me to lose weight and then she states that she does not want me to lose too much too fast. What do you want me to do lady? Lose the weight or stay my current size? I guess that you cant please everyone.

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    • First of all congrats on the loss of 20lbs! I’m trying to lose 10 by Nov 4th. I know it can be tough wanting to please everyone, trust me I’ve been there. But it doesn’t really help you with your goals and your happiness if you’re always trying to please someone. Keep up the good work and please yourself first ❤

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